I’ve just realized this recently too. It started at the butt crack of dawn. I just wake up to turn around and suddenly… MEEoooww MEEEEooowW MEEEOOOWWW! The bed shakes as a fur ball about the size of a football crash lands into my bed in an desparate attempt to get me up.
Yea I could just ignore her and go back to sleep but I don’t think you understand that it’s not that easy because now she knows I’m awake. That means this little kitty is going to try everything in her little power to keep me awake. This includes but is not limited to the infamous head butting, walking all over me and my head (ohhh she knows I hate that), and worse… it’s called the ONE CLAW. It’s where they take ONLY one of their precious, little claws and they scratch (usually) any visible skin. I love to sleep in a cocoon of blankets and pillows only allowing a small breathing hole but this little beeped beep beeped likes to stick her arm in my breathing hole and SCRATCHES THE TIP OF MY NOSE!
Nah-uh! This is the last straw for poor, little me who just wants to sleep for two more hours so I rip the covers off and suddenly the thing is no where to be seen. Pissed, I get up and rip through the curtains, look under the desks, in the closet, in the bookshelf, behind the laundry basket, and even in the litter box but I still can’t find her.
So I go through my morning routine and walk into the kitchen. There in the most innocent-looking manner is my cat by her food bowl waiting. I look down at the cat and decide my nose still stings. Her pleads and does figure-8s around my ankles are ignored as I pour myself a drink and continue on my merry way back to the bedroom.
I get one my computer and after about ten minutes her meowing FINALLY stops but she stays right beside me barely out of arms reach like usual. I’ll get up to get my charger because it’s never near when I need it and there she is in my chair with that smudge innocent look again. I sit on her. That ends that.
She wiggles out after making a fuss and I’m all like WINNING because I grew up in a time when EVERYONE SAID THAT. They don’t anymore.
Then the boyfriend comes home on break. You can hear the scratching on the wood floor as she races to get to him before he makes to the bathroom. She doesn’t.
Suddenly the creepiest thing you will ever experience in our house happens. The scratching. She will scratch at the door until you let her in. Doesn’t matter what you are doing. You could be brushing your teeth, trying to take a shower, or paying a visit to the porcelain throne, and she will want in on action. I don’t understand why she does but it’s amazing that we still have a bathroom door left.
Once you let her in the first thing she does it sniff the bathroom head to toe like it’s suddenly the whole purpose of tiny, little kitten life and then she just plops down on the bathroom floor and stares. Can I have some privacy please? No. Pet Me Now Dammit!
As if I’m gonna bend over anymore for a cat while I’m in the middle of my business? But ohhh help yourself if you don’t. She casually walks up to you and wipes her tail into your underwear. Her sass is incredible.
Never in my life have I had another cat like her. So you pet the stubborn fur ball who has you all figured out and you walk out the bathroom trying to believe that you don’t notice that one piece of cat hair in the deep depths of your underwear.
*Oh guys, this does really happen. If you like running around the house in just your underwear please beware of this happening. I promise you will not be wanting to wear them out of the bathroom once the fur ball has decided to nest in them. Fur-butter is not fun and think about what would happen if the relatives were over. Look on pinterest, or google, for more proof.
So I wait until I hear both of them to come out of the bathroom before turning off my laptop for the day and walking into the kitchen to join them. There sitting at (rather on) the table is Spoiled and her wet food, and my boyfriend wondering what’s for lunch.
He ends up making tuna sandwich. Something he just happens to eat for lunch every day.
Here I am at the table watching my cat scoff down her wet food and go racing up to my boyfriend’s heels. He gives her a half can of tuna!
WTF? signs are all but blinking over my head as I watch this happen. Sooo he’s the one who has been spoiling her with seconds! So I casually ask… “Hey, have you been feeding the cat in the mornings?”
“Yup,” he chucks some duke’s in with the tuna. That explains the morning chorus routine that’s been going on.
“How long have you been feeding her in the mornings?” I ask in a steady tone.
“Everyday,” He plainly answers.
“So that’s her third helping of food today?” I more of point this out than ask.
He suddenly realizes that this is a bad thing and throws his hand up like he’s innocent, “What?? She looked hungry!”
“She’s spoiled!” I explain.
But he only drops his shoulders and take a bite of his tuna, “So?”
I give up. My head smacks the table. I full expect the cost of food in our house to double within the next month. Maybe I should invest in a chain and lock for both the fridge and the pantry?
Does anyone else, who hopefully own a cat, have any of these problems? If you don’t own a cat and have these issues I have no clue what to tell you but please tell your story below.